THE REAL VALUE OF SUCCESS

First as a personal trainer, then a nutritionist, then a Chiropractor, and then a business coach; I’ve always lived in an alternative universe.  What I've grown to know through training and experience is that what people truly need to add lasting value to their lives almost always runs contrary to what they think they want or need. 

In all of these careers, I’ve had 3 choices with any patient or client:

  1. I can completely abandon my values and what I know they truly need to do solely what they want.

  2. I can grey my values and compromise the plan that gives them a quick return, rather than what gives them the best long-term return.

  3. I can hold completely true to my values and what most helps them.

Ironically, when I do 1 and 2, I usually end up with a whole lot of what I’m trying to avoid.  In an effort to make people happy and just give them what they “think” they want – everyone ends up miserable.  Especially me.

EXAMPLES:

  • When I was a PT and nutritionist; clients would come in who wanted to lose weight “fast.”
    MY VALUES ARE HEALTH, LONGEVITY, AND WEIGHT CONTROL THAT LASTS: The only way to healthy, long-lasting control and improvement of body weight is to begin consuming higher quality nutrients, creating an effective fitness program, and finding how to work all of this successfully into a time management schedule.

    THEIR VALUES: QUICK FIX –IT’S ALL ABOUT LOOKING GOOD FAST. “Give me a pill, a crash diet, a zero carb plan, etc. –I’ve got to look good at my reunion in 6 days.”

    SO: If I do it according to their values, “Quick fix,” or some version of their values, they may be pleased in our first meeting and I avoid conflict. On the other hand, long term, they will be unhappy. They still won’t look the way they had hoped in only 6 days, they’ll rebound badly from the program and gain weight, and long term they’ll look worse and hate me. (And I'll hate me)

  • I get the same thing as a Chiropractor- “I want out of pain fast.” However, there is typically an underlying issue that needs to be corrected and maintained in order to substantiate and sustain good health and eliminate pain permanently.

  • As a business coach, my major goal is to help leaders create a purpose-driven culture to drive up revenue, create corporate health, and deepen the engagement of their patients and/or customers. Their attitude may be, however, that they hired me to just get more business. I can easily help them just get more business. Usually, my business is up to 10x their business. However, if their leadership, communication, procedures, culture, organization, and relationships don’t improve or any of those items remains dysfunctional; where will we be in a year?

Anyone who compromises their values thinking that they’re avoiding confrontation or taking a shortcut to success, typically end up with a whole lot of what they’re trying to avoid which is more pain, more time lost, and more of the same.  Whatever you compromise to keep - -you lose.

If God has called you to win your race, God forbid you to take a shortcut and don't win your race.

Remember; with God, all things are possible

Dr. Ben Lerner

Ben Lerner